Articles

I am bathing in your misogynist tears.

Hauntings, curses, murderers, psychopaths and zombies.

This Is Why I Can’t Have Nice Things.

I said quietly hoping no one would judge me.

Everything you have ever wanted to know about the colossal squid without angering Poseidon.

The Girlfriend Zone > The Friendzone as far as trauma goes.

I’m lying, I don’t even know six friends. Or at least, they don’t know about me. MERRY CHRISTMAS.

The closest I got to an apocalypse was when a guy with toothpaste on his face tried to throw a chair at me.

Christmas is war. War is Christmas. Warwick Davies was alright in that series of Idiot Abroad but no one out shines Karl Pilkington… WAR.

England vs America. Tea vs Coffee. Only I like coffee better than tea. But I like crumpets more than anything.